It’s been two and a half months and Glenn is still being an ass. This Wednesday is the first one after the guy I was supposedly flirting with returns from his vacation. I have been threatened that nothing more better happen. Given that nothing happened to begin with I have no idea how to keep “nothing more” from happening.

First of all, I’m still alive. Yay me! (/sarcasm)

Glenn is still going on about this stupidity. We had a few quiet days where he would bring it up and I would ignore him. He’s now checking in on me every few minutes to tell me he loves me and to make sure I’m “alright”. Yeah, sure. I’ve got a constantly pounding head and lungs that are probably black from chain-smoking kreteks (did I mention I started smoking again?).

I am getting information about filing for divorce. Since some of this is coming via the library and I know EVERYONE at the library, I’m sure my plans will become the hot topic of discussion amongst the Townies. I’m still unemployed and will probably be homeless soon. I have absolutely no idea what I’m going to do. I had a plan but obviously fate stomped all over that. One thing I DO know I will be doing, regardless of where I end up, is I will be getting a NO CONTACT restraining order placed on his ass. I absolutely refuse to let him try to get back into my life once he’s out.

I want to thank everyone who replied, as well as everyone who wanted to reply but didn’t know what to say. I bawled my eyes out reading each response. I feel like a drama queen looking for attention whenever I make posts like these but, really, my journals are the only place I can vent.

Again, thanks!

Glenn has finally lost his last fucking marble. This past weekend the corps. did a show in Rochester, NY. Everyone complimented me on my new hairstyle including Mark, our new quad (drum) player. Despite the fact that Mark made this compliment in front of Glenn (I’d be suspect if he made it behind Glenn’s back), Glenn insists that Mark was flirting with me. He also insists that because I politely said “Thank you,” instead of screaming “Get the fuck away from me! I’m married!” I was flirting back. We haven’t even been back two whole days and it has progressed to him flip-flopping between “I love you. I trust you. I want to be with you forever,” and “YOU’RE A FUCKING WHORE! I KNOW YOU’RE SECRETLY PLANNING AN AFFAIR WITH HIM! I CAN SEE IT!”

I can’t do this anymore.

Wednesday night I arrived at color guard practice to learn our captain/instructor, Sandy, had quit, due to “irreconcilable differences”. I’m wondering if we can impeach our Board, Manager and President. Over the last two years the corps. has lost a good many members to other alumni groups, so the last thing we need to drive more away. But what do they do? They piss off an important staff member. One who could take at least half the guard with her. I can only think of two reasons that would be severe enough to make Sandy quit. One is that she’s being forced to write a whole new show for the guard, the other is that they let Ellie back. Either of those would probably make the rest of the color guard leave. We tried the whole new show thing last year. It was HELL! We weren’t given ample practice space, let alone ample practice time, so stress ran amuck. We made it clear to the Board we weren’t going to do it again. As for Ellie, well she’s a fucking bitch that nobody wants to work with. 😀

Thursday Amber T. Pusscat scared the beejezus out of me when she went hiding under the Teen’s bed for a day, after a night of spewing and shitting everywhere. I have no idea what caused it, but she is obvioulsy feeling better now. Both this morning and evening she jumped into my lap at meal time to remind me she hadn’t been fed, yet. I’ll have to keep a close eye on her to see if she’s getting into anything that I’m not aware of.

Thursday night Glenn secured himself a part-time job at a local liquor store. Yes, the alcoholic will soon be spending his nights surrounded by booze. *facepalm*

I received an email from Sandy last night. Apparently those irreconcilable differences were reconcilable after all. She’ll be back next week. I just hope they caved, not her.

My wrist is now wrapped up in a nifty wrist brace because the combo of color guard, hand washing clothes, and surfing the internets has wrecked havoc on it. It is much fun trying to weight train with it on. Not. I have no choice, however, because the free weights put stress on my wrist, too.

I found this in my email this just a bit ago: http://www.savetheinternet.com/blog/2008/02/25/comcast-blocking-first-the-internet-now-the-public/ I didn’t think Comcast could sink any lower. Sadly they have proved me wrong. I think it’s time we vote them off the planet.

Because of the car and the computer we fell behind in our rent. Further behind. Like two and a half months late. We don’t have any money in savings because Glenn spent it all. We can’t borrow any more money from the credit union because Glenn is already maxxed out (because he keeps taking money from our savings). So we can’t make a dent until we get our taxes. Glenn said he spoke with our landlord about this and he’s cool about it, yet the past due notice I found in our mailbox seems to speak differently.

Yesterday the landlord popped up to announce he’s going to have the exterminators in on Friday to take care of the roaches. He ever so nicely pointed out that he thinks we are the reason why the infestation is so bad (despite the fact that it was WE who told him that if he didn’t get on the ball he would end up with an infestation this bad), and dropped such phrases as “your lease is up in a few months, isn’t it?”, “wouldn’t you like to live someplace nicer?” and “your apartment is the only one that hasn’t been remodeled, but I can’t do it while you’re still here.”

It goes without saying that I didn’t sleep well last night, spending most of the time either crying or shivering from stress.

Fuck.